Running update #1

Hello Dear Readers!

I must apologize. I have failed miserably at keeping up at my own commitment to myself to keep a public journal. But the wonderful thing about life is that each and every new moment is a moment ripe for lasting change! Well, here's my first official running update!

Yes, I have been training for the Chicago marathon! For real! Okay, I will admit that I have missed a few short runs, but by and large, I am well into my training schedule and I feel great! Well, great, given the circumstances. I mean, I am running about (a bazillion).7% more miles than I have ever ran per week before. So, yes -- I have blisters on my feet. Yes, my knees and ankles hurt too much. Yes, I have chafing in my...well, I have chafing. But the important thing is that I am learning how to be a runner.

Anyway, what I really wanted to tell you all is this:

I am not just training for the marathon for myself. I am raising money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society so they can continue to battle blood cancers by providing funds for research for cures. They also provide money directly to patients currently battling leukemia, lymphoma, and myeloma to help them pay the bills for health care.

Placed next to the challenges facing the folks battling these diseases, my struggles are a walk in the park.

Please, please, please -- if you are interested in what I am doing, let me know! I will be happy to give you more updates and let you know how my training is going. And if you find yourself inspired or proud or just want to help out, please consider giving a donation on my behalf to LLS. Here is a link to my fundraising page:

http://pages.teamintraining.org/il/chicago09/kfranke

For now, let me just leave you with some photo evidence of my training. Photo credits go to my lovely Kathryn. And also to my lovely Canon Rebel XSi.



Yes, you see right. I draw deep inspiration from running next to historic Soldier Field, home of DA BEARS, in the heart of MY HOME, Chicago, IL. And yes, I do have Popeye forearm-calves. It is disgusting, I know. Sorry.

Happy trails to you, Dear Reader, until we meet again.

Kevin, a.k.a. Champ, a.k.a. Your Working Boy

Part 3: You are what you do

You are what you do, and not what you think. Good intentions are useless without a matching effort to bring them into fruition. If you regard yourself as special but act like a fool, then you are not special - you are a fool. If you have problems acting like who you think you are, then either revise your personal standards or get help learning how to behave, or both.

THE END.

P.S. Chill out, man.

Protest the Beard-block

Hi everyone!

So, let's talk about Protest the Hero. If you are one of the lucky ones who knows me pretty well, then you should know how much I love this band. I have been an outright supergeek about their music since '05/'06 and have followed them closely ever since. I have seen them live four times in Chicago, one time in San Francisco, and one time in Iowa. (And I am kicking myself for turning down a chance to see them in Baltimore last week!) I can go on and on about them. But I won't, for your sake. Anyway, after the show, we checked out the record store above the venue. Lo and behold, two of the band members walk in.


From left to right: My pal Alex, lead singer Rody "Choad" Walker, lead guitarist Luke, Yours Truly.

Please notice their beards. Three of five of the band members have grown their beards for over five months and guitarist Tim has not shaved for over three years. His beard (and hair for that matter) is RIDICULOUSLY LONG. Check it out in this picture I took at the San Fran show last month:



So the guys are doing this because they wanted to compete and participate in the 2009 World Beard and Moustache Championships in Alaska. Tim has had this in his sights for three years! But today, just TODAY they found out that their tour dates in Alaska were canceled by their promoter, virtually eliminating their chance of getting to the competition. They're an amazing band and truly gifted musicians, but they simply don't make a lot of money, and it would cost them a lot of scratch to get to the competition.

I can not imagine how crushed they must feel now. They planned an entire U.S. tour over a half-year in advance to end in Alaska for this event. They ENDURED the entire tour (as the D put it - "the road is fuckin hard, it's also really fuckin tough") They did not shave for over five months! This was going to be an amazing celebration for a job well done - something all 5 of them could share together.

So, it was a very bittersweet experience for me. I am both deeply happy and deeply sad after tonight. Obviously, I was so excited to meet these guys in person (again!). I was even happier because now they are on their first headlining tour of the U.S. and things are going pretty well for them. I think they deserve to not have beer bottles thrown at them on stage, and it seems that it has not happened to them in a while. On top of it all, they told me some of their future plans (taking a break to write a new album, assembling a large-scale comprehensive documentary dvd chronicling band history and misadventures, and, oh, right, a live set on DVD!!).

I wish there was some way I could have helped them. Luke told me that the band is taking the cut from the canceled Alaska shows (half of the deal with the promoter) and will fund Tim's trip to the competition. What a sacrifice they are making! It was really encouraging to see the way they support each other - gives me confidence that they are going to stick together as a band for a while. Also, Tim has some special plans to put his hairiness to good use. Check his myspace blog post here: http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendId=7964123&blogId=489133581

In conclusion, I suppose I should mention that the show was incredible. The sound was very good and the guys nailed most of their parts. Oh my with the circus bonanza and the Limb from Limb sweep city...

I love metal!

Part 2: Vertigo

These days when I lay awake, I am often overcome with a severe feeling of vertigo. No, not because my bed is perched upon a six-foot loft. Rather, I feel as if I am perched upon twenty-two years of living that might actually be of little substance whatsoever. It is a dizzying, sickening sensation to look back at a lifetime of eager, brimming passion and great potential and suddenly feel that there is nothing solid to grasp onto.

Have I ascended to this point on nothing but a cloud of illusions, or have I indeed been climbing upon the earth with my hands and my feet, exerting genuine effort and achieving true accomplishments? Often, the answer is not clear to me.

Ask anyone very close to me and they will let you know how I feel about myself at interval. I feel as if I squeak past my requirements with only the bare minimum. I rarely think my effort warrants the rewards I achieve. I am convinced that I yield results that are but a fraction of my real potential.

I feel as though I should be consistently blasting out home runs, but I am typically off the mark. I turn good pitches to hit into pop ups and ground outs, but occasionally I will find a gap or the wind will blow one out for me. And why? I am a chronic time waster. I am typically late. I struggle with focus. My discipline fluctuates wildly. I’m a big talker. I’m a poser.

Did I mention I am easily discouraged?

With every squandered opportunity, every disappointing performance, every shameful decision I make, I feel my conviction in my uniqueness is dulling. It becomes increasingly difficult as I grow older to reject the thought that, indeed, I once was special, but I have since ruined my chances to make an extraordinary life for myself. There is nothing more terribly convincing than watching your own actions – or inaction – destroy your own dreams.

Part 1: My waking dream

When I was young, I would lie awake at night and think. I would think about atoms and time and the beauty of music. And I would be filled with such joy - such pure and beautiful joy - that I would shiver with excitement. One night, I realized I was an extraordinary person and decided I would lead an extraordinary life. I concluded that all the marvels and wonders of existence of which I was so acutely aware were mine to behold and to cherish, and, most importantly, to cultivate and manifest into a life of tremendous accomplishment and joy. In those moments, I felt no greater truth than this: that my life was special and that I would use it to do great things for myself and for others.

Dire Straits

Dear Reader,

As promised, I would like to begin to articulate some of the values upon which I have settled in my young adulthood. In the last week or so, I realized just how crucial this documentation is because there might come a day when my vision of these values blurs and I begin to adopt bits of the garbage philosophy prevalent in the many, many people that have given up their right to think as individuals. As such, dear Reader, allow me to communicate some of my values regarding work.

My personal expectations for my current job are as follows: a) to develop skills that will make me useful to future employers and equip me to accomplish future career goals, b) to benefit and promote IIT and the Velocity Initiative, c) to positively impact the people I interview, and d) to learn, learn, learn – and continue to grow into the man I want to be.

My priority will not always be my own comfort, nor will it never be. I will work hard to perform highly, but I will not bleed for a cause that is not my own.

I am not worried about being pampered or squeezing as many pennies as possible out of my employer. I do not want to be lazy, I do not want to feel entitled, and I do not want to take my opportunity to work for granted. If I expect to be treated as a professional, I must consistently act like one. If I expect to be treated with luxury, then I am to have earned it through my sweat and my ability. I do not expect rewards to come quickly or easily, nor do I want them to! Let me get my hands dirty. Let me learn how to really work. I do not assume that I am an expert now – in fact, I am still just a beginner!

In short, I don’t want money for nothin’ or chicks for free. I don’t want my MTV.

If it is necessary to keep reminding myself of this, then so be it. These are my values, and they will guide and reward me, should I stay faithful to them. It will be a struggle to do so in the modern work environment. But it is the absence of these values in great big groups of people that harms the good, honest, and hard-working humans out there, to whom the world itself rightfully belongs!

If – and it often does – excellent work goes unnoticed, it is never wasted work. That is, as long as it was applied intelligently. Hard, intelligent work at any endeavor will shape me into a hard-working, intelligent man. If I can be just that at whatever I do, then I will earn all that I deserve in life, regardless of the immediate rewards.

Until later,

Howard, Your Working Boy

This is a book

Dear Readers,

Lately I have felt stirrings of confidence and passion within me once again. With excitement, I welcome back the familiar feeling of purpose and of hunger for life. Each new day, I feel as if I am emerging a little more from the hazy confusion of youth and inexperience. I am ready to commit to a craft, no longer fearful of abandoning many potential paths for a single one. After all, it is much easier to repel distractions when your energy is focused, and not thinly spread over too many efforts. No longer am I sampling freely from the all-you-can-eat buffet of life. I am digesting now - absorbing the lessons and wisdom like nutrients, expelling the frivolous and foolish like shit.

I see myself now with a marvelous clarity that I did not have several months ago. I can state with confidence my core values and where I learned them. One must never underestimate the importance of this recognition. I still remember the confusion of having an undeveloped set of values, like an adolescent attempting to maintain physical coordination throughout a growth spurt. Thankfully, as I am entering a phase where I will be making very big decisions about my education, career, and home, I know very well who I am as a man.

Furthermore, I feel greatly aware of the length of a human life and how my actions now fit into the big picture. With my job, I am fortunate to gain a much larger perspective on life. Life is long, but the world is full of others who have lived through theirs and from whom I may learn. The future is a mystery, but it is *probably* coming, so we had better be prepared anyway. We will never know what the world is going to do to us, but if we know who we are, then we will always know how we wish to act within the world.

I should like to write more on the actual values and lessons at a later date.

Until then,

Your Working Boy, Arnold